If you do…
If you don’t…
None of it stands to reason
None of it rings true

Control and manipulation
Random shots in the dark
A landscape, oh so stark
Why the stay of execution

Trying, what?
Hit and miss – poor odds
Is that really your best shot?
Delusions – not the right path of action
Look for
Communication, not excommunication

Who is the type of person who repeatedly throws ultimatums into the ring?
A fully functioning human being knows that communication is the key to resolve conflict.
Issuing ultimatums is acting like a child, it’s throwing a tantrum because you want to get your own way, it’s raging and stamping your feet.
I can understand children throwing tantrums for a variety of reasons, mainly because they haven’t yet learnt to communicate, express how they feel – but an adult?
Why would anybody ever resort to that? Ultimatums smack of desperation, frustration, they’re an attempt at control and manipulation. Ultimatums only work in certain, dire type of situations – but as a way to repair a relationship? Nope.
Issuing ultimatums is the same as erecting barriers, shutting down the gates on communication. It’s useless and (especially when used repeatedly) only breeds resentment. Ultimately, ultimatums (usually) areΒ the death knell of relationships.

Image credit:Banksy “Mobile Lovers” – Telegraph.co.uk

13 thoughts on “Ultimatums

  1. You are absolutely right. Issuing ultimatums is extremely childish and a sign of frustration. Ultimatums shouldn’t be a part of any healthy relationship.
    I love the poem ❀ I know I'm repeating myself…but I'm just a big fan of your work πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Even with young children, ultimatums have a small window of effectiveness. Open communication is the best way to work past conflicts.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That was exactly my point Natascha, that it should be a last resort in a very limited number of situations…ex: my husband is an alcoholic, he has refused all my attempts to help him overcome the addiction, he won’t seek help, my children and I are unhappy and suffering as a result, maybe financially and obviously mentally…who knows, maybe he is physically abusive too. In any case, it’s a *desperate* situation and I can’t let my children or I suffer any longer, so the ultimatum: “seek help or we are leaving” I can understand. (By the way, this is a totally hypothetical situation, I don’t have an alcoholic husband)
      A rather long-winded comment but I wanted to make the point: ultimatums are a last resort for certain desperate situations only.
      Thank you for reading and commenting πŸ™‚

      Liked by 2 people

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