You, fumbling in the backseat… as if we were 16… I played along, faked a lack of expertise but now,
I’m all out of magnanimity, I’m not even sure it was funny
to start with.
It takes a special type of man to turn me submissive.
There are some who can bring me to my knees, with a look and the tantalising sound of a zip,
their fingers twisting, pulling my hair, gripping my neck…at times, I like nothing better, I don’t even mind the resulting bruises.
Those men ain’t you.
So why don’t you brush up on your technique & personality,
forget the
1,2,3 and switch
lifted from
unimaginative porn movies
lose the guitar, the pretending you’re a rock star, with the same 4 notes played over and over again, trash the copy of “On The Road”,
quoting Kerouac – without heart – will only take you so far; even the whiskey bottle, it’s all staged, all for show,
and by the way, I don’t at all rate Jared Leto.
Look at you strutting your stuff, thinking you’re a fallen angel, an experimental artist, I guess the fact you’re a dental hygienist is purely accidental,
a mere step on your road to greatness.
I was bored babe, in a state, that’s the only reason you caught me in your tatty net when you went on your “catching a rare butterfly” quest.
When it comes to fantasies & lovers,
you’re down on your luck and I don’t give a fuck
because
let’s be real,
I’ve actually got more balls
than you.
Image Credit: down-a-rabbit-hole.deviantart.com
Wow! How scathing is that!? I love a woman with balls. Figuratively speaking, of course. 😉
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Figuratively speaking, of course Rob! 😜
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If not, I might get a bit unnerved. 😀
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I can only imagine 😂
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Boom! 🙌😱😂
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😎
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😉
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Bang-o-Rang!
Fantastique!!!!
Nathalie❤️ I love this
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Thank you, Antony!
Mon petit morceau de paradis canadien 💜
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😍
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Lucky I don’t have stitches. If I did. I’d have burst them laughing in a MOST undignified way! I think this is marvelous! I have written similar ‘treaties’ about the humor of a man who thinks he’s a LOVER and turns out he’s one step removed from the 16 year old … oh good grief this was good! Reminds me of a modern update of Cheri and the Last of Cheri, remember that?
POWER to you!
As a side-note, isn’t it interesting how many times as women, we step aside and ‘let’ things occur because we’re bored or can’t be bothered to say no, and they occur and it’s as if we don’t inhabit the moment but watch from rafters, humoring the intensity of their fumbling. I can remember just such an instance, I think I was very cruel and it is so true what you say about it takes a lot to make you submit, I know you mean that more than the usual 50 Shades of Lame and it’s very accurate, you really nailed this. Brilliant in humor, truth and verve.
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How could I not remember the Last of Cheri? I grew up with that stuff, I have such affection for it!
I’m so glad you saw the humour in this too, I’ve got such a sarcastic streak I always think people must miss it when I’m being genuinely funny, at least in writing coz in “real life” it’s much easier to tell.
As for your aside, YES! I’ve had that, that time when you’re regretting getting into the moment but it’s all too far gone to backtrack and you’re just watching it all from a great height, like an out of body experience type of thing. Gosh, shuddering just remembering about one such instance.
And yeah, I wasn’t talking about the 50 Shades of fucking Lame, I won’t get started on that because those books are so awful in TOO MANY ways!
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I laughed because I read an article said so many people bought that damn book and gave it to charity shops one shop made furniture out of used copies of 50 shades. THAT is classic.
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Excellent.
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Thank you, awesome pontificator 🙂
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Terribly nice I really like this.
Shoot love ❤
You're unique!
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Thank you so much! You’re always so supportive, my lovely friend 💜
Have a wonderful evening 🙂
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Like Virgil said…..
Everyone is Attracted to what he likes.
I wish you an excellent evening beautiful friend.
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Oh! I love this!! Scorching!!!
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Haha, thanks so much! It’s a rather mordant piece but I quite like it 😉
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Burn! This is awesome. There are a few men to whom I’d have loved to say this kind of thing. 😈 Not Jared Leto, though… I kind of love him. 😜
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Oh, you’re a Jared Leto fan! I was waiting for that, when I wrote it I was thinking that one or two of them were going to come after me 😜😂
He just doesn’t do it for me at all but…different strokes and all that 😉
Thank you, so glad you liked 😊
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No worries! 😃
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whoa!!!! bam! What an explosion! Love this, Nathalie!
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Thank you, Eric! I’m so pleased you like 😊💜
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I did! Posted the second part to the Fairy story for you! 🙂
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I just read it and I LOVED it! I wish you were able to see the huge smile on my face right now 💜
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Wow. You’ve just blown some
poor sod right out of the water.
An excellent piece. 😎
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Thank you! Yeah, I guess I kinda did but I never do anything like that unless it’s richly deserved 😉 I’m actually real nice, most of the time 😇
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Wow, don’t hold back! BOOM! 🙂
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Haha, I didn’t, did I? But there is always a good reason for me to let rip, I never do that gratuitously 🙂
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I’m sure of that! 😀
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Ouch! Most men probably couldn’t stand an honest review of their performances. Such as this one!
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I feel like I need to justify myself with this one, I would never have let rip without a good reason 🙂
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Somebody will take a lot of coming back from that put down, you are always extraordinarily incisive with your honesty and bloody sexy about it as well.
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Thank you, you are always so kind with your comments. I hate repeating myself and I seem to be doing that a lot today but this wasn’t gratuitously mean, somebody needs to have crossed a line for me to write like that about them.
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One can only imagine how fun it would be to be on your good side hehe!
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Haha, thanks! I like to think it’s a LOT of fun 😉😈
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Wow, I think someone is gonna need some cream for that burn! If that doesn’t shatter an ego then I don’t know what will! Beautifully scathing with your usual sexy self-confidence. Loved it! 🙂
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Thank you Adam, I’m glad you liked! But I’m going to tell you what I’m telling everyone else today: I wouldn’t write about someone in such a mordant way if they didn’t thoroughly deserve it 🙂
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I did, very much ☺ I’m sure it was deserved! 😂
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Ouch! 😛
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Well…repeating what I said to the other guys today: I’m never gratuitously mean, so somebody must have crossed the line for me to write about them like that 😈
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It read close to home. 🙂
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As if anybody would ever dream of doing such a hatchet job on you! You’re everything but fake, Matt! 💜
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Oh no no, you misunderstood lol I’m no faker. I meant that I read it as something close to your home…like a real experience of yours. I could totally see you laughing some pretender off 😜
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Riiiight! I totally misunderstood, I thought it was weird, lol…and yeah, you got it right, this is steeped in “real” for sure 😜
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@”I’ve actually got more balls than you.” – excellent… both in English and in French… 🙂
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Thanks Mélanie, I like it in French too 😜
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This! So much of this. Fan-fucking-tastic! #WriterSister ❤️
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Of course *you* would get this! 😉
Thank you, for being you and being so awesome 💜
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Love the cadence of this, well done. 🙂
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Thank you! 🙂
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Mʏ turn, my turn.? Larry mentioned eaցerly wiggling to
ɡet an opportunity to tаlk. ?I feel the perfect factor about Good is that hhe can beat
up the devil bеcause the satan iѕ frightening and mean and ugly and
unhealthy and God can bedat hiim uup so the satan can?tһarm us like һhe did those demon stuffeԀ individuals inn Jesus day.
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Ma Cherie! Like to think I’m one of the ones who could make you submissive as I take you by the neck.
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