When you thought you were gonna drown
You wrapped your arms around me and pulled me down
with you – I was suffocating, trapped in somebody else’s misery
Withering, no oxygen, poisoned by the fumes of hypocrisy

The slow erosion of everything I thought I knew, an acid so corrosive
I could not even perceive – grasp – how one could be so manipulative
All the things I did for you, you never tried to do the same
I was trying to save you, from you, I must have been insane

I’m the mirror you shattered with your warped reflection
You play the blame game but the deceit, the deception
Was all yours, drama of your own making – raging, not caring
Due to inability – twisting, distorting, lying, stonewalling, never admitting

You have no empathy – but oh, the mastery of perfidy, the cruelty
The gaping hole at your centre – sheer and utter lunacy
Is not anything I ever want to deal with, ever again
There’s no more pain, yet I bear the scars and the stains

We are the makers of our own destiny – fuck the stars
It’s down to us, not the Cosmos or the God Mars
I grabbed happiness by its slippery tail
Fought it, won it – end of this pitiful tale

Painting: “Echo and Narcissus” by John William Waterhouse




I am the cliché driving off into the sunset
On my way to that mythical unspecified place
Where damaged and tortured souls conglomerate

You’ve seen me in many films
I’m positive I made you weep
Inspired you even, this stuff’s pretty deep

But baby, I have to tell ya
That sunset leads nowhere fast
Stay put, work it out, you can’t run from the past

Okay, so this came to me while looking at the sky this evening in the car: one joke about driving off into the sunset, a remark on how many movies have ended that way – and I came up with these modest but very cynical few lines. Don’t blame me, blame the sea and sky for inspiring such cynicism…(well, ok, you can blame me a little)

Thought of the day


The closest pub to my house is tiny and very old-fashioned. Everyday, a *mysterious someone* from the aforementioned pub writes their “thought of the day” on the board standing outside. Said thought is usually funny, it can be clever or interesting – but occasionally it makes you think with a statement that’s worth discussing in the pub garden with a bunch of friends: debating for hours over drinks – one of the greatest pleasures of life.

Pagan Fire


Wood crackling, flames licking and devouring
scraps of virtual notes –
words and emotions now redundant,
from a past no longer relevant
Letting go and letting it all burn
So I could somehow emerge
I didn’t quite dance naked around the flames,
but in the air was a pagan flavour all the same
I stayed and waited
until the colours faded,
until this blazing power
had turned into a whimper –
for the surviving, occasional flashes
to be no more than ashes
Purged of everything that didn’t matter –
I was strong again and ready to conquer

Image credit: pixshark.com

Freedom of Speech and Satire are necessary in any Society

image PEN American center has decided to present their PEN/Toni and James C. Goodale Free Expression Courage Award to Charlie Hebdo, the French magazine that was the target of a vile attack in January – when journalists were murdered in cold blood in the name of religion.

This decision to hand this award to the French magazine was met by disapproval by a number of people. As a result, six writers — Peter Carey, Teju Cole, Rachel Kushner, Michael Ondaatje, Francine Prose and Taiye Selasi — said they were withdrawing from the gala because they were not comfortable with the award going to Charlie Hebdo. A further 140 writers have signed a letter protesting against the PEN award going to the magazine.

I respect their decision but I cannot say I understand it. In fact, I must admit it baffles me. What those writers are seemingly saying with their non-attendance (and the protest letter) is that Charlie Hebdo was ultimately offensive and racist – and that its freedom of speech should have been curtailed.

There was (and is) nothing racist about Charlie hebdo’s cartoons. This magazine has a long history of satirising and it satirises absolutely everything and everybody. Nobody is spared, which is just as it should be when it comes to satire. The “prophet” which is the subject of people’s ire appeared a handful of times on covers of the magazine. Christianity was derided far more often and it sometimes angered Christians just as some Muslims were angered by anything that had to do with the prophet. Christianity (Catholics in particular) Islam, Judaism….you name it, the magazine lampooned it. Nobody is saying that satire cannot be offensive, because of course it can. But that is sometimes the point – to make people stop and think. There is a world of difference between something that might be offensive, and something that is outright racist and hateful though. I’m sorry, but anybody with half a brain should be able to tell the difference between the two.
After the attack in January, the first cover of Charlie Hebdo carried a photo of the prophet with the headline: “All is forgiven”.
It was a wonderful and incredibly generous thing to do so soon after the bloodshed in their offices – so how anyone can accuse the magazine of racism and being outrageously offensive is beyond me.

I believe that satire has a vital role to play in society. Satire is what keeps governments and institutions more or less in check. Satire is a way to inform people of what is going on, of pointing out flaws and hypocrisy, and yes, a way to broach subjects that are deemed to be too “sensitive” to be talked about.
What those six writers are saying by withdrawing from the gala is that freedom of speech only goes so far, that it has its limits.
Well, I am appalled by this point of view – we should be able to discuss everything and lampoon it all. In this sometimes very bleak world, humour is what keeps most of us sane.
It goes without saying that freedom of speech does not entitle one to incite racial hatred, or any kind of hatred for that matter. But this does not apply to Charlie Hebdo as what they were (are) doing was merely satirising, pointing out the ridicule and hypocrisy of certain situations, institutions and people. Satirising something does not mean change is necessarily going to happen as a result (although it sometimes does) but it means that we are aware (and making others aware) of certain wrongs.
I do believe the fact I’m French has a lot to do with my passionate belief in freedom of speech. I was brought up in a country which values intellect. We are a nation of people who like nothing more than discuss and debate things around good food and wine. We understand that people have different ideas, different point of views, but rather than get mad at them, we like to engage them in a lively and often humorous debate.
Satire and the extent of it – what one can get away with – has a lot to do with context. Would Charlie Hebdo have happened in a country other than France? Probably not. The French get it – they might not agree with all of the magazine’s lampooning, or even most of it, but they have no problem with the essence of the magazine – with what it’s doing. The French understand that you are allowed to have an opinion and express it, that you have to laugh at things, that pointing out flaws, with a laugh, is a much better way than doing it while shaking your fist – they might not agree with what you have to say, but they understand that you’re allowed to say it.
We are the country which revolted against the injustice of inherited privileges, the country that murdered our royal family. The French Revolution was violent and bloody and stayed in the French psyche – it remains with us to this day. We fought and shed blood for our rights: one of them being that all men are (or should be) born equal and with the same advantages – and yes, we fought for freedom of speech as well.

So the French get satire.
I am very proud of being French but I have no problem with denouncing anything at all my government or my countrymen might do which I deem unacceptable. Being French is a very important part of my identity – yet I can laugh at myself, my country and our culture. Like every country, there is much to “laugh at” in France. The French can be pompous, rude and arrogant, they produce endless “intellectual” movies with way too much gratuitous sex in them, the bureaucracy in France is an absolute joke, customer service in France is appalling, etc……
People have laughed at the French for so long. Fuck knows I’ve heard enough “French jokes” and had countless swipes taken at me because of my nationality over the years – particularly here in England where I now live.
Do I care? Not at all. As long as you’re being funny and you have a point, take your best shot – I’ll probably agree with you.
Do I sometimes get annoyed? Yes (if the jokes are not particularly clever or funny) Do I ever feel deeply insulted? Very rarely, but it happens, when people are just being nasty and cruel. Have I ever been tempted to throw my fist in somebody’s face when they were particularly offensive? Yes, if they caught me on a bad day and displayed rare levels of ignorance and racism. So yes, I have felt like it, but have I ever done it? No. Let alone think about picking up a gun and murdering people in cold blood just because they have offended me.

Charlie Hebdo laughed at everything: politicians (from France and other countries) from the left, centre and right, and all religions.
The journalists assassinated in their office in Paris in January knew the menace that hovered over them. They knew what they were doing was dangerous (they’d had many threats over the years) but they passionately believed in telling the truth and freedom of speech.
No award is going to bring them back to life and it’s meagre consolation for their families. But it’s an award they deserve for their unwavering courage in the face of intolerance.
The facts that journalists were murdered in cold blood in the capital city of a civilised country is horrific, utterly shocking and totally unacceptable. Is it going to silence the magazine or intimidate the French? No.
The religious fanatics who committed that January attack tried to “murder” Charlie Hebdo and free speech. The fools only succeeded in making it stronger than ever – and uniting an entire country.
I find it incredibly strange that writers, of all people, don’t seem to understand the significance of free speech and what it encompasses. But to all of them who oppose the PEN award going to Charlie Hebdo, I can only say – as Voltaire did before me: “I may not agree with what you have to say but I’ll defend to the death your right to say it”. That is what free speech is all about – vital.

Image credit:imgarcade.com, izquotes.com, lifehackQuotes, slideshare.net, James Walmesley for the wonderful “Je Suis charlie” drawing and David Pope for the equally awesome “He drew first” drawing

50 shades of Grey

Yesterday, just before sunset, we chose to take a walk on the beach
It was windy and cold but rather beautiful and very atmospheric
Between the sky and the sea, there was so much grey –
grey everywhere, ‘infinite grey’ we called it
That’s when we decided to reclaim 50 shades
because right here and right now were many variants of grey,
infinitely more beautiful and also much better written –
although there were no words
There were powerful, enticing, dangerous and sinful greys
that put Mr Grey firmly back in the shade
Bad and trashy literature has its place, but when it’s the only literature you’re exposed to
You’re better off looking to nature for thrills and inspiration